Nuggets of Wisdom: The Australian Male

Well since the Man and I officially parted ways (though I'm using the word 'since' here kind of loosely, but let's not dwell on that...) I have been dipping my toes into the murky world of post 30's dating.

I know everyone says 'dating'* is supposed to be different and more difficult when you're out of your 20s. I'm not sure about this. I still feel young. I think a suprising number of people actually like feeling old, but I am not one of them, so I'm going to continue to have a young outlook on life. So I don't have a problem with going out with guys as such.

So I don't have a problem myself, but I sure feel sorry for the men in my future! They will all be compared to my beloved Man, who is perfect for me in every way, and if he was closer to my age and we had more chemistry, we would surely be married and living happily ever after.

I was thinking about this last night as I traipsed tipsily home after a pleasant dinner with..erm...The Man and a friend of his last night: The Man has always slagged off Australian males, saying they're chauvinistic cavemen types who drink too much and wouldn't know culture if it slapped them in the face. I always thought he was being a bit harsh because he's an Australian himself, in the same way as I'm sometimes overly harsh about things from my own benighted homeland, bless its rainy little heart. But my new situation has seen me spending more time than I ever have with Aussie men - ie, a bit - and I'm beginning to see his point. Here are some things I have noticed about a certain kind of Australian male:

• Propensity to drink too much. I am not talking about the very young, either. I have always dated older men, so I often hang out with the older age groups, which now translates as late thirties upwards. And by this age, years of overindulgence is beginning to show. And it's not attractive.
• Boringness. I have passions outside work and am very active. A man might not be interested in my particular hobbies - unless he is gay - but have some passions, ok?
• Drugginess. Not cool in the over 30's. A certain amount of experimentation is understandable in 20 somethings, but when you're approaching middle age, and especially if you're married with small children, popping pills to have fun is a bit disturbing! And what is it with cocaine use? I was at a party the other night when people kept disappearing to the bathroom to snort lines. These were OLD PEOPLE. Call me naive but I find this kind of shocking! I look to people who are older than me to be wiser and have their lives a bit more together than I do. Not to be tragic, self-indulgent pleasure seekers. Who become even more boring when they're high than when they were sober.
• Sleaziness. I'm talking about macho jokes and thinking of attractive women as meat, or prizes in some kind of game; and telling you that an interest in porn and strippers etc is an inevitable part of being a guy - you know, boys will be boys, and women have to accept it. Well I know at least one man who isn't in the least bit like that - my the Man - so I reckon perviness is an optional extra, and I am perfectly reasonable in holding out for a non-sleazy bloke. I would also like to say, guys, that I think it's extremely rude to openly ogle other women when you're with a woman - especially if you're dating her! I mean, what the hell is that all about? Do you want me to dump you??!!**

I think there are just too many available women in Sydney and that many men here have let themselves go because they know they are in high demand. But they might find that although there are plenty of women wanting to be with them, they might not be quality women. Some women would prefer to opt out of relationships altogether rather than be with a creep. My new housemates might fall into this category. They are both lovely and attractive women, but do not have boyfriends, that I know of. Otherwise it seems strange to me that such nice women have not been snapped up.

I love how, in view of the above, men are so quick to assume that because you're kind of attracted to them physically, you probably want to marry them and have their babies. Ahahahahahha! I'm looking out for some quality DNA for my children, so they can relax!

I know there are quality Australian men out there. I am just looking in the wrong places, I guess. I know they exist and I would love to find one who is single and willing to go out with me! But until then, I think celibacy is the best option, before I get a completely twisted view of mankind and have to move to Erskineville and become a lesbian.

You may have guessed, I'm 'seeing' someone else at the moment. Let us call him, the Other Man. I like it. It makes me sound more worldly, like I have multiple affairs going on because I'm so sexually sophisticated. I prefer to say that I'm 'seeing him' rather than he's my boyfriend, because 'boyfriend' sounds intimate, and I feel decidedly not. We'll see how it goes. Watch this space.


P.S. I know I've been super bad about maintaining this blog. That's because I got so busy at work a while ago, and it's never eased up. I am still busy, but have decided to take time out to blog anyway. In a sense I am giving myself a payrise. Equal pay/less work = a higher rate of pay per working moment!

*Just so you know, I hate that word, unless you're an archeologist
**Obviously he doesn't. I am a real prize.